Capitol Hops Farm

We have hops - more than we expected when we started this experiment and that aligns perfectly with our mantra "expect nothing and you won't be disappointed."

The size of the harvest is unclear...maybe because we underestimated the size of our green thumb or maybe because we didn't adequately prepare the "farm". The last picture in the set is our initial harvest. We have sprouts on the vines ranging from beginners to almost ready to pull so maybe we'll get a few more. Not bad for are first ride on the tractor.

The Latest in Auto Safety

George Hile's beer belly saved his life. In April, a truck carrying 35 tons of fertilizer smashed into his cattle truck leaving Mr. Hile with a cracked pelvis, two broken ribs, a fracture in his spine and torn tendons in his finger.

Said the article "Somebody who lacked the Lilyvale truck driver’s generous girth would have died...Mr Hile remembers seeing the bull bar of the semi-trailer just before impact, on the highway between Oakey and Toowoomba. He thought 'this is going to hurt'." (just like Cole Trickle in Days of Thunder.) Hile laughed it off saying "my guts saved me".

Mr. Hile is still confined to a wheelchair as his wife, Roslyn, has taken over his driving duties to keep the family business going. It will be more than a year before Mr. Hile will know if he can resume his career as a livestock carrier.

DC Beer Week, Sort of

May 26, 2009 - June 1, 2009, is unofficially beer week in Washington, DC. We say "unofficially" because the Mayor and DC Council are too busy negotiating the use of baseball tickets to focus on important things like beer or crime (but not because the Washington Post declared it the unofficial beer week). So, what's going on in DC this week? Below are the highlights.

May 26, 2009 - Brasserie Beck is serving a four-course meal featuring various French micro brews.

May 27, 2009 - Hawk 'n Dove is hosting a Capitol Hill Craft Beer Bar Tour

May 28, 2009 - Sierra Nevada Artisan Ale Experience at Stoney's Bar and Grill

May 29, 2009 - Lupulin Slam at RFD

May 30, 2009 - One word: SAVOR

June 1, 2009 - Finish the week with Greg Koch of Stone Brewing Company at the Brickskeller.

A more complete list of events can be found here.

Mad Dash for the Hooch

Earlier this week, the Gainesville residents were faced with a tragic, horrific ordeal when a Toyota collided with a tractor trailer hauling kegs of beer. The driver was moving south along I-75 at 7:20 am when "for unknown reasons, drove the Toyota across the center and inside lanes before hitting the median guardrail. Then the pick up returned to the freeway where it was hit by the semi." A witness who wished to remain anonymous reported the driver seemed on edge and particularly eager to get to the beer. Haven't we all been there?

The Gainesville Sun goes on to report that minutes later a late-model GMC truck crashed into the semi "coming to a stop about eight feet inside the trailer. Columbia County firefighters and deputies were instrumental in cleaning up the crash site and controlling traffic." The cleaned up beer will be used at this week's Columbia County FD Texas Hold 'Em Poker Tournament & Fundraiser (to buy a new hook and ladder truck).

In a related story, Sherriff Buford T. Justice is still chasing the Bandit and Cledus.









Thanks to our friends at Gheorge for the tip.

A Little Father-Son Road Trip

In our continuing series that highlights the lowlights of drinking and fatherhood we today bring you the story of Joshua Fagan of somewhere in or near Fort Myers, Florida. Having recently lost his job in construction and his wife to divorce Mr. Fagan did what many of us might do - he had a few drinks. As is sometimes wont to happen, Mr. Fagan had enough to recognize that he was in no condition to drive. He apparently was drinking at home so being impaired and not driving is good but doesn't get you the same bragging rights as if you were smart enough to cab it home from the bar.

Here's where the story gets interesting. Mr. Fagan was not done drinking and decided that rather than break the law he would simply have his 9 year old son drive to the store for some more of the good stuff.

The local CBS affiliate, WINK (seriously, the CBS affiliate is WINK? Florida is messed up) followed the story. Here's a portion of Maggie Crane's Peabody-worthy report:
*******************************************************************************
REPORTER: "We have this police report. Would you care to comment on the safety of your son?"

FAGAN: shut the door to his home without comment.
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Riveting.

Final Verdict: Perk-A-lator Stout

We managed to go a full 7 days beyond the one month aging for our Perk-A-lator Stout. Part of the reason for the extra week is that the key players were stuck in Orlando and/or Phoenix when we should have been crackin' the hootch.

After a little chilling in the fridge we hit the first capped bottle - b/c we are big dorks we marked the first bottle just so we could know what we were tasting. The beer pours dark and full in a way that only a good stout can. By dark we mean opaque, lost in the middle of woods in the dead of night with no stars while the Blair Witch is looking for you kind of dark. The head is heavy with a nice chestnut color but it settles down rather quickly. The scent provides a slight hint of coffee. Taking a nice big first swig - because we are daring and only sissies take a tiny first sip - and the stout flavor jumps out at you. The carbonation is good but not great. There is a slight coffee finish. Overall, Perk-A-lator came out with smashing success for a homebrew. We are quite proud and have been downing it heavily since opening the first bottle.

As close as we are to brewing experts there are a few drawbacks. The first being that the coffee flavor, while present, could be a bit more full in the after taste. We mentioned that the carbonation is good but not great and we stick by that - if we could take it down have a notch the brew would be smooth as silk. If you're shooting for something as smooth as Guinness we just missed. Finally, the scent after pouring is pretty good but there's a slight tinge of pungent - maybe alcohol smell. You really have to focus to pick it up but it's there.

This is not a movie so we're not going to bother making up a lame scale of beer bottles or pint glasses. Regardless, it's the best brew since bringing on my trusted assistant. It's also a close second to our pride and joy Oatmeal Stout (brewed before we discovered the blogosphere).

Keeping It All in the Family

Indiana state police arrest a woman for drunk driving and it appears she was driving with her child. Not the best decision making but that's not the point. According to the article, the troopers called several family members to pick up the child. First, the father shows up drunk to pick up the child - he too gets arrested. Then the grandparents show up and turns out they had been drinking. Fortunately for the child, grandma was under the legal limit so officers escorted the happy trio home.

GO HOOSIERS!

Vote or Be Shamed

It's election day and we here at the D-liner don't care who you vote for we just care that you vote. When you're done voting do not forget to where your fascist "I Voted" sticker proudly - preferably some place where everybody can see it. Stand a little taller so you can look down on people that didn't bother to vote. It's everybody's right to vote and because you voted it's your right to shame others into voting by wearing your little sticker.

You're better than those Socialist, Commie-pinkos that don't need to vote; that don't respect the right to vote. Feel free to flick boogers on these non-voters who still live in their parents basement and couldn't break free from their online gaming so they could wait in 8-hour lines filled with voting glitches and hanging chads.

When you're done looking down on the slackers go to CNN's iReport and post your video about how great you are and how you reminded all the non-voters about their civic duties (because posting your video means you almost work for CNN).

If you didn't vote please purchase "I Voted" stickers here or here or tell people you don't wear one because you didn't want to ruin your coat.

Finally, A Real Exit Strategy in Iraq

You want to bring peace to Iraq and, frankly, all of the middle east? The first step is probably opening a beer hall in Kurdish-controlled northern Iraq. The Press Association (sersiously? There is an Associated Press and a Press Association?) is reporting that Gunter Voelker opened the beer hall and even threw his own version of an Oktoberfest complete with drindl-clad waitresses. Said Mr. Voekler, the festival can be held with people from "all over the world in peace and in a real good mood."

We have high hopes for this new peace movement because nothing is more appreciated in the middle east than scantily clad women and alcohol. If only we could force them all to play baseball instead of soccer...

Creating a Logo

So, we have a logo. Sure, there is a first draft business plan but let's be honest - business plans are far less inspiring and creative than logos. Business plans are filled with jargon, rationality, numbers and justifications. Any good logo is a beautiful work of art that speaks to the public and defines an organization. Everybody knows the Red Cross logo, the Ford Oval, and the Sierra Nevada nature scene. If you don't know these then you need far more help than we can offer.

At the risk of it being poached we will provide a brief description. Hopefully it will be vague enough to remain original when we release an image yet described well enough that you get a good sense of where we are going. Without further adieu....

We are seeing the name of the brewery written in an upside down "U" formation, effectively serving as the border of the crest. Inside the crest and coming from a distance is the bridge with Bison standing at the ready. Behind the bridge an image or silhouette of the major architecural accomplishment of the city. Colors - TBD.

If you can picture it in your head you're getting a feel for where the brewery is going. The next step is to find a graphic designer/artist to scope it out and make it real. When we have that we'll post it here for all the world to see.