Vote on Election Day; It's Important, Seriously We're Not Kidding

We have, on more than one occasion, encouraged our loyal reader(s) to turn out on election day. Voting is only the single most important activity a citizen in the republic can undertake to ensure the sanctity of democracy. The sad fact is our movement has not been very successful. It's well known that election turnout is generally low in non-Presidential election years. In 2010, the election turnout was 45.5 percent. By comparison, the 2012 turnout was 61.8 percent. New York reports slightly lower numbers: 43.6 percent in 2010 and 58.7 in 2012 (source: Census).

It is not an understatement to say that 2014 may be the most important election in decades; regardless of party affiliation. It certainly matters who controls the Senate in 2015, who will represent you in the state legislature, and who will be the Governor of your state (commonwealth's not so much). All of this is beside the point.

What matters more than all of this is the state-level effort to take away your right to vote. Al Jazeera America calls it the return of Jim Crow. Several states are relying on the Interstate Crosscheck system to clear voter rolls of people suspected of voting in more than one state. Crosscheck reviews names (first, last, middle), social security numbers, and other data in what is lauded as a sophisticated system critical to detecting voter fraud. Except that, according to the report "Crosscheck deliberately ignores Social Security mismatches, in the few instances when the numbers are even collected. The Crosscheck instructions for county election officers state, "Social Security numbers are included for verification; the numbers might or might no match"." Nearly 1.6 million names in the system lack matching middle names. If this system were alive in New York that means both me and my father could be accused of voter fraud. NPR has its own story on North Carolina. Here's a fun story on voter suppression in Texas.

We have a different strategy in New York. Rather than suppressing the vote the parties in New York suppress the choice. Democrats and Republicans here cross-endorse four candidates for State Supreme Court. Four candidates who were strongly encouraged to fund raise for the party and four candidates who did just that. This is an age-old tradition where pay-to-play reigns supreme. Knowing that most voters go on party lines the parties virtually guarantee each candidate a victory. Don Esmonde of The Buffalo News sums it up nicely here.

There is really only one way to stop this madness. It has less to do with getting money and PACs out of the process and more to do with pounding a little pavement until you get to your local booth and cast a vote. They are counting on another 45 percent turnout; not to get gun control passed/defeated, not to restrict/loosen access to health insurance, or even to divest/invest in infrastructure. They are counting on another 45 percent to maintain power, control, and money.

So, even if you vote for none of the above please go vote.

Obamagone

Belgian-owned brewery Ommegang, near Cooperstown, NY, found out just how fun the folks are at the Alcohol and Tobacco Tax and Trade Bureau. The brewers at Ommegang did a one off batch of beer just in time for next week's inauguration festivities. Dubbed "Obamagang", the TTB stepped in stating it is not permissible to use anyone's name or likeness without their permission. The newly re-named "Inauguration Ale 2009" will be available in select bars in Syracuse, Chicago, Boston, Washington, Philadelphia and New York.

In a related story, Hostess will make available it's new "Inauguration Cupcake 2009". The previously named "Obamalama-ding-dongs" received the new moniker just after the Ommegang story broke in today's Examiner.

Vote or Be Shamed

It's election day and we here at the D-liner don't care who you vote for we just care that you vote. When you're done voting do not forget to where your fascist "I Voted" sticker proudly - preferably some place where everybody can see it. Stand a little taller so you can look down on people that didn't bother to vote. It's everybody's right to vote and because you voted it's your right to shame others into voting by wearing your little sticker.

You're better than those Socialist, Commie-pinkos that don't need to vote; that don't respect the right to vote. Feel free to flick boogers on these non-voters who still live in their parents basement and couldn't break free from their online gaming so they could wait in 8-hour lines filled with voting glitches and hanging chads.

When you're done looking down on the slackers go to CNN's iReport and post your video about how great you are and how you reminded all the non-voters about their civic duties (because posting your video means you almost work for CNN).

If you didn't vote please purchase "I Voted" stickers here or here or tell people you don't wear one because you didn't want to ruin your coat.

ESB Easy as 1-2-3

It dawned on us that this blog is supposed to include a fair amount of brew reviews and we've been slacking. Why have we been less accountable than a presidential candidate? We really don't have a good reason except to say that like any good Gen-Xers, we're lazy.

So, we found ourselves at our semi-local watering hole, Franklin's passing the time watching the Flyers face off against the Thrashers because there's nothing else on. Seriously, it was that or the end of the ESPN interview of Brett Favre's wife - a disseration on the uselessness of ESPN will someday be covered by our friends at Gheorge.

This evening we decided to go crazy on Franklin's newest brew Anne's ESB. Here's what we know about the brew. Anne is one of Franklin's finest - a day manager. Some have said she's bitter, like the aforementioned ESB (or our ex-wives), but we can't confirm as our midweek drinking is reserved for the evenings. We prefer to be hungover at our 9-5, not drunk. ESB is "extra special bitter" - not exactly marketing genius but don't let that scare you. This beer is where it's at if you like a complex flavor. It's literally brewed with 6 different hops and 6 different malts and the result is 6 percent alcohol - appropriately completing the late October trifecta. We're not saying ESB is evil but the flavor is pretty bad ass - if you can handle a bitter beer and flavor too.

Free Beer Tuesday!

And as usual there is a catch. A club out of Pensacola called HandleBar is offering free beer to everyone who turns out to cast a vote in the November elections. Unfortunately, you can only get one beer for one vote - we believe it's in the Constitution (unless you live in Washington, DC). Sources claim that if you contact your local ACORN representative they can help verify that you voted more than once. We can't promise this will result in more free beer but it's worth a shot.

Since you don't get any kind of receipt for voting, the fine folks at the HandleBar are trading the commonly handed out "I voted" sticker for the free beer. We encourage everybody in the Pensacola area to vote early and vote often. If you prefer to ignore your civic duty you can always purchase a roll of "I voted" stickers for you and your friends here.

Get Blind Drunk and Pull the Lever

Early voting has started in several states - Like New Mexico, where a woman from Albuquerque got herself completely hammered before showing up to the election site. The woman was reportedly so disappointed in her choices for president that she actually passed out while voting. Be honest - there's a little bit of this woman in all of us. In case you're wondering, it's not illegal to be drunk while casting your vote in Albuquerque. It's not clear that she completed her ballot but officials have declared her vote will count. Democracy at it's finest.

Not to be outdone is the country of Guatemala where they actually have to ban the sale of alcohol prior to their presidential elections. Apparently being sober when you vote allows you to be constantly reminded that you voted for the guy in office that is driving the country into the ground. Of course, Guatemalans are good drinkers and there are reports that many people started stocking up on booze before the ban.