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Magician Simon Pierro at the "Hofbraeuhaus" in Munich, Germany.

Happy Anniversary Cleveland

If I told the tale of a once-great city along the shores of Lake Erie whose residents have great pride, strong work ethic but few jobs and lowly sports teams to help pass the harsh winters what city comes to mind?

Cleveland, OH like Buffalo, NY, is a rust belt city and a cheap joke for most parts of the country. (The Edmund Fitzgerald was not really headed for Cleveland, for crying out loud.) So, when it comes to public shaming Cleveland should know at least one Buffalonian feels your pain. In many ways, Cleveland is Buffalo's big sister. As a kid, I remember going to Cleveland's new Jacob Field to see the Indians take on the Yankees. Right around then, the Buffalo Bisons signed on to be the Indian's new farm team. Aside from sharing one Great Lake and a little baseball history there are many facts that highlight a greater bond.So, we being with a quiz.

Guess the Lake Erie Rust Belt City!

Q: This city's average population declined 13.12 percent per decade since 1970.
Q: This city's last professional sports championship was 1964.
Q: Average high temperature in this city is 56 degrees.
Q: Named most miserable city by Forbes.
Q: Second largest city in its state.

What residents of the Northeast Corridor, the Southwest, and California don't know is that rust belt cities are beautiful. Cleveland is home to the Playhouse Square Center - second largest performing arts center in the country. Buffalo is home to more than 50 public art galleries including Albright-Knox and Birchfield-Penney. Steve Harvey, Arsenio Hall, Phil Donahue, and Drew Carey - all from Cleveland. Ani DiFranco, Rick James, the Goo Goo Dolls but also Cannibal Corpse and moe. belong to Buffalo. Both cities have some of the most beautiful architecture in the country. This barely scratches the surface.

Today, Clevelanders celebrate the anniversary of 10 cent beer night. While I haven't been to Cleveland in over a decade, I imagine they celebrate it in much the same way Buffalonians celebrate the anniversary of "wide right". You can read about the fun here and here but you can probably piece together what happened on your own. I also imagine that Clevelanders have the same sense of pride you find in Buffalonians, which is to say we're a little tired of getting kicked in the groin just so you can feel better about your elitist "real city" problems. We have poor economies but tough people with warm hearts and friendly smiles; real houses with yards and everything for less than condominiums in some cities; and the commute is wonderful. We have history and culture and great craft beers. OK, our sports teams suck but it keeps us humble. So, next time you need to feel good about yourself knock on somebody else's hometown.

Happy Anniversary Cleveland - you're a hell of a city!

Cleveland should adopt a similar philosophy!

Quiz Answers

Cleveland: Average population decline 14.4 percent per decade since 1970

Buffalo: Average population decline 13.12 percent per decade since 1970

Cleveland Browns won the NFL Championship in 1964. The Buffalo Bills won the AFL Championship in 1965. There was not a Super Bowl to win in 1964 or 1965 but it's worth noting Cleveland has never played in the game and the Buffal Bills lost it four consecutive times (which is worse?). 

Average high temp in Cleveland 59 degrees (average low 42).

Average high temp in Buffalo 56 degrees (average low 40)

Cleveland, though Techflash.com asks "Really, worse that Detroit and Buffalo?"

Both Cleveland and Buffalo are the second largest cities in their respective states.

Marketing is for Chumps

Generally speaking, craft brewers don't have big advertising/marketing budgets. This does not mean breweries leave all the creativity inside the bottle. To that end, we're kicking off the "Marketing is for Chumps" series bringing you the best and worst in craft beer marketing, advertising and art. Cheers!

Uinta Brewing Company - Salt Lake City, Utah

Abita Brewing Company - Abita Springs, Louisiana

Oskar Blues Brewery - Lyons, Colorado

Chocolate City Beer - Washington, DC

I'm on Fire

Nestled comfortably between the Baby Boomers and the Millenials/Generation Y is Generation X. As part of this heroin-induced flannel party, I'm old enough to have settled down by getting married, having children, and gambling a large portion of wealth building in homeownership. I'm also young enough to not quite adhere to all the rules that result in career advancement but that's probably a good thing. Gen-X loves Clerks, knows the soundtrack for Singles but never saw the movie, and still loves Alice in Chains.

The hardest part about being Generation X is understanding the new world. I like to think that 100 years ago flappers had the same problem. The industrial revolution was in bloom and full of promise but most folks from 1912 presumably looked back fondly of their time growing up on the farm. In 2012, I'm living the Office Space dream looking fondly back on growing up in a blue collar city where manufacturing was, and still is, the primary economic engine.

Being stuck between two colossal populations is not necessarily a bad thing. Well, except that the Baby Boomers refuse to retire so Gen-X is a decade away from moving into the "good life" that is middle management. Most of us are relegated to a couple of steps above entry level waiting for opportunity to knock. Of course, opportunity will never knock because when the Boomers retire (or die) Gen-X will compete for slots with Millenials who are more eager, less hardened by life, and more accepting of the new world (not to mention their generation is not defined by slackers). Generation X is probably the last great rebellion but the bulk of us are resolved to nothing more than setting up our children to ensure they kick Millenials in the ass.

Technology is perhaps the best illustration of this dynamic. Baby boomers hate technology. (Everybody knows one Boomer who spends too much time on Facebook but this is simply the exception that proves the rule.) Most Boomers have the expendable income for the latest iPad but use it as little more than a glorified web browser. Millenials are the opposite. Technology is for them what the automobile was to young WWII veterans returning home to southern California. Those of us stuck in the middle understand technology's power and power is not necessarily a good thing. Gen-X is a generation of skeptics so we're still waiting for technology to be as great as Verizon Wireless commercials advertise. At the same time we have access to more wonders than ever previously imagined. This is to say nothing of privacy; which is dead.

My kids are already more advanced than both of their parents. At 2.5 years of age they easily find their way through a smart phone to find their favorite Muppets videos. In an effort to encourage the early adoption of technology that will lead to the eventual ass kicking we purchased the Kindle Fire. I was not surprised they liked it. I'm surprised that I like it. The Fire traveled with me on a recent work trip and made quite a companion. Reading books on the Fire is quite nice (except for take off and landing) and videos are wonderful. Note: if you purchase the Fire sign yourself up with Amazon Prime.

Why Beer Matters by Evan Rail is a great first read for the Fire. It's a bit of an easy read and too predictably gets into the beer v. wine debate. Mr. Rail makes a compelling statement that beer is democratic and few other beverages are connected to time in the way beer is.  The e-book also has nuggets of beer information that would encourage any beer drinker to more research - like Starkbierzeit, which is now on my bucket list, or attempts to review Grodziskie; a Polish smoked-wheat beer that went out of existence in the early 1990s and has been nearly impossible to recreate. Mr. Rail brilliantly ends it with "what matters most about beer is the drinking of it."

So this entire, rambling post can be summarized with: 1) you should buy the Kindle Fire; 2) make Why Beer Matters your first read; and 3) enjoy a nice craft beer or homebrew.

I Deserve This Beer

There are two reasons to have a beer: 1) because you want one and 2) because you deserve one. Despite what the big brewer commercials will have you believe 99 percent of the time you simply want the beer. Maybe you convince yourself you deserve it but, statistically speaking, you just want it. Most nights (early afternoons and the occasional mornings) I am comfortable in knowing I simply want a cold one but today I deserve this beer.

My father spent the better part of 40 years on the factory floor for FoMoCo. His brothers did the same. His father as well. Hell, even his mother worked in the factory. When Dad wasn't working in the factory he was working on cars with friends. He also rides a Harley. My folks worked a lot of years so I could go to school and avoid a similar fate. So, for the better part of 37 years I managed to avoid the factory floor and most other forms of "work". Despite a love affair with cars I never, until this weekend, did any more than change winshield wipers - that was a weeks long project. That's right, I've never even changed the oil.

First, some background. We live in the city and park our car on the street. Our 2010 Ford Flex has been hit four times in just over two years while parked within view of our rowhouse. Two hit and runs, one unlicensed driver in a stolen vehicle running from the fuzz after buying from the drug house, and the most recent hit and run a few weeks back. The lesson being don't own a vehicle in the city unless you have offstreet parking. And, don't live near drug houses.

The Damage

The most recent swipe was just that. Somebody smacked the driver's side mirror knocking the mirror plate out and rendering the rest of the unit useless. After reviewing the particulars (including the very real possibility that our insurance company simply gives up on us) I start thinking "I bet I can do this". Knowing full well "I can't do this" I entertain the small bit of manliness I have and find that you can actually purchase the part online for under $200. Rationalizing that means the repair shop charges around $500 I head back to the Interwebs and find a Flex bulletin board where there's a full conversation about replacing the driver side mirror. The replacement mirror arrived earlier this week taunting my mechanical skills. I have tools. A full set. I just never use them.

The folks at FordFlex.net made this sound like an easy fix. One person in particular, going by the name Dashdog's Photos, even posted pictures bragging that it could be done in under 30 minutes. With fears of causing additional damage dancing in my head I sauntered out to the Flex in my best auto mechanic outfit - new jeans and Johnston & Murphy casual shoes. All told, the change out took me about 25 minutes. It was just as Dashdog said and I fixed my car. Seriously, I replaced the mirror. It's fully functional and I caused no ancillary damage to the door or the rest of the vehicle. Dashdog, you deserve a  beer too so where ever you are thanks for the help.

I fixed my car. I don't care what anybody says I deserve this 90 Minute IPA. Today, it tastes just a little better and I'm sitting just a little taller. In a couple of days I'll see my Father and a small part of me can't wait to tell him about this weekend. I fixed my car.

Finished Product

Brotherhood of Man on the Planet Earth

He has nothing on Freddie Mercury but he is better than Wayne Campbell.

h/t G:TB via BuzzFeed

Update per Deadspin: The singer featured in this piece is Robert Wilkinson. He's 29 years old, unemployed and...a home brewer! 

Collaboration: What is it Good For?

I've been thinking a lot about the word collaboration lately. It's certainly part of my daily lexicon along with synergy, streamline, low-hanging fruit, and best practices. If you've ever been confused by TPS reports you know what I'm talking about. The word "collaboration" is more than simple cubicle jargon. It has a very powerful impact (because I don't understand affect/effect) both positive and negative. Collaboration is a conundrum.

Americans in Paris, written by Charles Glass, is a look at Americans living in Paris under Nazi Occupation. It must have been a terrible time to be anywhere in Europe unless you were German. Paris is the City of Light and Americans living there prior to the occupation enjoyed a cultured life with great writers, great music, and legal booze. Some of the main characters in this book prove the "Greatest Generation" theorem. Others, not so much. The subplot is the plight of French civilians who were generally divided into three groups - those in the resistance movement, collaborators, and everybody else. It didn't get terribly awful for Americans until after Pearl Harbor and our subsequent entry into the Allied effort. It was a little more complicated for the French who did not enjoy the same immunity as their American friends. As I read this book, I find myself wondering where I would have fallen on that continuum whether American or French.  I like to think that I would serve the resistance efforts but I would probably have been part of the vast majority just struggling to survive (the weather, the occupation, the horror). I take some comfort in knowing I would not have been a collaborator. Collaborators worked with the Nazi occupiers. Some did so shamelessly others more covertly. Collaboration -1  

I took this picture!

This week, President Obama and the First Lady welcomed Great Britain's Prime Minister David Cameron and his wife. I had the honor of being one of more than 7,000 on the White House grounds to welcome the very same folks that 200 years ago tried to burn the place down. Both the President and the Prime Minister noted the irony and made a few corny jokes before reminding us of the the great collaboration between Great Britain and the United States over the last 199 years. They used words like "alliance" and "partnership" but I prefer collaboration because none of this happens if you're not working together. The obvious example of collaboration here is World War II, given the theme established in the above paragraph. Other examples include military efforts on the Korean Peninsula and the current fight against terrorism. Military collaboration is an easy one. I was struck by Prime Minister Cameron's comments on financial investments - for example, the Gates Foundation working with NGOs in Great Britain or that Great Britain investments in the United states amount to more than 100 times more than China. Collaboration +1

Of course, the best possible positive use of the word is associated with beer. Collaboration Not Litigation is born from the good use of "collaboration". Seems that way back when Avery Brewing Company and Russian River Brewing both had a Salvation Ale. Rather than get into a beer pong match over naming rights the brewers combined the best of both and it's as good as advertised. We're enjoying Batch #6 bottled in the first month of this year. The taste is big, malty, and tangy-sweet. It's a bit sticky and lingers in your mouth for a spell. The beer is copper in color and leaves sexy lacing all the way down your glass (that's right, sexy). And, it comes in a bomber. I love bombers. Collaboration +1

As an American I believe in rugged individualism, pulling up the boot straps, and lonely cowboys riding off into the sunset. As a human, I believe in collaboration (by at least a 2-1 margin). Nobody gets anywhere without help from somebody else.  Sometimes working with others just helps you get through the day and sometimes it results in a really great beer.

This one too!